Untenable Questions

V.J.’s Weekly Challenge #39: Unanswerable

V.J. invites us to respond to her prompt “Unanswerable”.  Click the link above for more information.

I’m not bothered by what is

Unanswerable for some…such as, what

Follows when our life on Earth ends.

Faith satisfies me, removes all fear…

My true Home awaits in Heaven.

Faith doesn’t answer every question.

What wearies me, what I find

Unanswerable, is how people can do

Horrific, reprehensible evil to others…

In particular, to their own family, friends. 

Faith’s reply: “we live in Adam’s fallen world”.

It disgusts me that abusers offer their

Own past abuse as acceptable reason for

Scarring individuals known, or strangers.

Why do they deserve compassionate

Understanding…some special mercy?

Because my God metes out both mercy

And judgement…and, “His thoughts, ways

Are not as man’s”. (Isaiah 55:8)

I was abused, I didn’t become a serial killer

Or embark on path of any criminal activity.

What continues to stymie comprehension…

The aching unanswered questions in my life:

Why would my mother despise me?

How could my parents devalue me…

Accord me status of servant…rather than

Looking, and seeing a child…theirs…a gift?

I would have done anything for their

Love, but it did not exist.

The church teaches we must forgive

“Imperfect” parents because they have

Their own issues, baggage, wounds.

Response which embittered me: “they did

The best they knew how”.  Then, why

Wasn’t my best ever good enough for them?

Different standards, apparently.

I’m waiting to hear that I get a pass for

Remembering them with no affection.

For all of us, God’s grace requires not perfection.

©Ennle Madresan, 2019 ~ All rights reserved.

“For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” declares the LORD. Isaiah 55:8  https://biblehub.com/isaiah/55-8.htm

16 thoughts on “Untenable Questions

  1. None of us are perfect, but there is definitely behavior that I will never understand. I ask how and why but I don’t expect an answer. We each bear our own responsibility for our impact on others and the world. (K)

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    • True indeed, we are all accountable for our impact…though not all learned minds agree, which just starts a whole new line of questions for me. Thanks much for reading and commenting–I appreciate you being here ❤

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Have finely come to realize that my parents were not capable of giving me the love I craved, and as my psychologist says: I need to give myself credit for my resourcefulness in surviving. There is a wisdom (more than knowledge) that shines through your work. I would guess that it comes from all that you have suffered and survived. All that said, I too, often ask such questions too.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: So Many Questions – One Woman's Quest II

  4. You are obvious wise to realize you are more than your parents gave you credit for. Congratulations on being an over-comer. I will add that there are also parents who raised their children with love and wisdom, and have broken hearts because the children did not heed their wisdom nor accept their love. Sadly both are evidences, as you say, of a fallen world. Every person is responsible for their own decisions. But God the righteous Judge will some day mete justice. He said, “It is better to have a millstone around their neck and drown rather than hurt one of these little ones.”

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    • There’s a lot of spiritual blindness involved–my parents were not committed Christians, if they were even saved. Godly parents, too, will make mistakes–they’re human; but really good parents will admit mistakes to their children, and gain greater respect and love. What you said is true, we have a “righteous Judge”–that word “righteous” makes all the difference, to me. May He bless you abundantly today ❤

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  5. Your words touched my heart, Ennle. I have pondered the same question about irreprehensible, human behaviour that can so dramatically affects a ‘supposed loved one’s’ life. A ‘monster in disguise’ crossed my path years ago and the repercusions are still lingering. I try to be grateful for my moments and new chapter in life.

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