Getting Jerry Out (3TC) (Dull and slow-moving and stolid; like an ox)–WordWeb)

Today’s prompt: shortbread, cannon, guru

My niece’s husband is a bovine sort, but has

A heart of gold; she loves him, that’s what

Matters…but getting him out of his recliner

To go do something, anything…good grief.

There was a historical festival scheduled

In a nearby park, so Kate and I ganged up

On him:  “It’ll be fun, Jerry—vintage

Cannons and stuff,” I said.

“And food, hon…probably shortbread

Your favorite,” Kate lured.

A smile snail-crawled across his big face.

“Mmm,” he said, “okay, I’ll go.”

We arrived amid the large, energetic crowd.

Jerry ambled toward the large cannon

While Kate and I admired gorgeous

Tapestries, musing about women in the

Middle Ages plying needles and floss

While waiting for their men to return

From Crusades or some other adventure

Or mischief…victorious, gravely injured

Dead, or dead drunk.

We met up with Jerry after awhile, all of us

hungry, and bought humongous steak burgers

With fries…but Jerry still had shortbread on

The brain and wanted to scout out a booth.

Seemed like we walked miles, seeing scones

And other treats…but no shortbread.  Jerry

Finally settled for scones, and we sat down

On painted benches to rest.  Kate asked her

Husband if he’d enjoyed himself, and whether

People had seemed historically knowledgeable.

“A few were,” he shrugged, “it was okay…

There was one guru claiming to have a

Doctorate in weapons history.”

“A guru?” asked Kate, “isn’t that kind of

Oxymoronic—a spiritual leader who’s an

Expert in weaponry?”

Jerry grinned slowly, “now who’s the moron?

He didn’t say anything about having personal

Proficiency with them…just his field of study.”

I was laughing mutely behind my hand…

Kate and I were Scrabble addicts, obsessed

With words…and part of the fun was inviting

Jerry to join us, and beating him soundly.

He’d caught me giggling… “listen, Smarty English

Major, I know both ‘oxymoronic’ and ‘moron’, okay?”

“Fine, fine, I was merely entertained by the wordplay…

Quite brilliant, Jer.”

He smirked, turned to Kate.  “Y’all ready to go?

I want to stop by Piggly Wiggly on the way home

Get a tin of shortbread .”

©Ennle Madresan, 2019 ~ All rights reserved.